Pursuers get exhausted. After trying everything... talking, begging, holding back their needs, getting angry... sometimes they just give up. When Pursuers become Withdrawers, the relationship is in trouble. Join sex therapist Dr. Laurie Watson and couples therapist George Faller as they talk about dealing with burn out in a relationship.
Laurie and George demonstrate best ways to initiate a conversation to get your partner to open up about sex. And secondly, they talk about how to change the conversation with our kids and friends so we change the culture. George says he feels like he's been let into a secret society of women when Laurie reveals her girlfriend talk.
Do 2 withdrawers ever get together? They do but when there is little conflict there is usually little sex. Both people are so intent on being nice and not demanding, the difficult conversations that create intimacy just don't happen. They avoid the negative emotions and unfortunately shut out the intense emotions would make them feel securely connected. Join sex therapist and author Laurie Watson and couples therapist George Faller as they talk about withdrawers in relationship.
Why would a withdrawer have an affair when their partner is begging them for more connection? How can a pursuer get over their shame to see their partner's pain? George and Laurie use attachment theory to add understanding that helps answer the question... "why, did you do this?"
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Affairs devastate the trust and connection in a committed relationship. Recovery and reconnection is possible. Join sex therapist and author Laurie Watson and couples therapist George Faller as the talk through how to reconnect after an affair.
Nothing more sexy than talking about stress! How we perceive stress is how it impacts our body and which makes it inseparable from sex. Connection with another is the fastest way to relieve stress. George leads us in a discussion about how to change distress into eustress by changing our mindset about seeing stress as a challenge and reaching out to a partner and fight problems together. Drawing from his writing in Sacred Stress, George helps Laurie think about a couple who look at the same moment - an erotic moment in two different ways - one as eustress (highly exciting) and the other sees it as distress (highly anxiety-producing.)
One of the big disappointments for some women is when their partners don't want to do cunnilingus with them and they do. Join sex therapist and author Laurie Watson and couples therapist and author George Faller as they discuss how to have great cunnilingus.
Masturbation is a topic few couples are comfortable talking about; yet it is something that we all do. Join sex therapist and author Laurie Watson and couples therapist and author George Faller as they talk about masturbation and how it plays into your relationship.
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Most fantasies have the theme of someone being so into you. In our fantasy, our partner is showing high levels of engagement, high levels of passion and high levels of initiation. George and Laurie talk about how to tap into the energy of fantasy to bring new information, new ideas to the partnership. Try a fantastic lube at www.Uberlube.com/foreplay
Sexual trauma in childhood can wreak havoc on adult emotional and sexual relationships. While challenging, traumas of this gravity can be healed. Join sex therapist and author Laurie Watson and couples therapist and author George Faller as they discuss how you can heal childhood sexual trauma.
Trauma, PTSD, and other troubling experiences can invade and derail your relationship. Join sex therapist Laurie Watson and marriage therapist George Faller as they respond to a listener's letter about her husband's PTSD and how it plagued their relationship.
Sexual problems are opportunities to actually get deeper with each other. Cohosts talk about a man with ED and how he feels alone, alienated from his own body for fear of failure as well as alienated from his partner thinking he will let her down. George shares how withdrawers strengthen their muscle memory to go away when they don't share their "ouch" or what hurts, denying themselves the comfort that their partner might offer. Laurie share how vulnerable sharing actually draws a partner in.
When our hearts are connected, we can lose ourselves sexually in one another. Great sex requires a bit of knowledge, a lot of vulnerability and a willingness to explore more than just genital pleasure. George and Laurie talk about exercises they give clients to get more in tune with each other by exploring touch and the skin of their lover.
Q&A for a woman, who's husband prefers porn and a man struggling with ED. George says, "When I think about porn, I don't come at it from a moralistic point of view. I think, does the porn serve a function to strengthen a couple's emotional bond, or does it create more distance?" Laurie and George discuss how the fear of rejection in a man with ED prevents him from sharing his vulnerability and receiving the comfort he deserves from his wife. Instead they both stay separated and dissatisfied.
Men who feel sex as their primary path to connection are often told "all they want is sex." Indeed, sex is exciting and pleasurable to them but also the way they feel and want to express love and connection. Listen to George Faller and Laurie Watson talk about how men feel about sex; why the couple needs their sexual motivation and what they can do to have more of it.
Women who feel sexually alive and use sex as a pathway for connection can feel out of place in a society that tells them - women don't/shouldn't want sex as much as men. Laurie and George discuss healthy women who are in touch with their bodies, their desire for their partners and long for physical intimacy. When rejected the relationship can be strained, she can feel crushed emotionally and she can question her very attractiveness. Co-hosts affirm her right to have her needs met.
We think men always want sex. But some of them don't chase their partners. How can we understand this phenomenon? Laurie and Geoge talk about one issue - sexual performance - causing one man to sexually withdraw. But there are other reasons as well...
Sounds pretty discouraging if your partner says she'd be fine never having sex again. Laurie and George discuss how to get to the root of what she's saying. Using an acronym O P L E A S F helps us organize what has obscured her libido.
Pursuers' frustrations -- what's it like when you want more and you can't get it? What's it like to work so hard and see your partner walking away from you? We know it feels unfair and want to help you see how you push that might be driving your partner away! Get vulnerable for your own sake.
Learn why your withdrawing partner feels they are keeping you safer by shutting down. Understand what is good and useful about withdrawing behavior. Hear George walk Laurie through a better way to help her husband feel safe about opening up in a personal example.
Sex therapist and author Laurie Watson, together with expert, couples therapist and author George Faller delve into the world of the Emotional Distancer to help you resolve your relationship conflicts with smart moves.
Laurie tells George her own story of why she became a sex therapist. Hear about her moment of decision when she stopped the negative pursuing cycle and changed her marriage. Laurie shares her heartfelt commitment to be the generation to love and struggle to become securely attached in order to change the course of her family's legacy and how you too, can change your family's future.
Foreplay - meet my new podcast cohost, George Faller, LMFT - a global leader in couples therapy! George debuts and tells his story of trauma to transformation. After surviving 9/11 as a firefighter, George, having become a recent graduate in marriage therapy, became the designated couples therapist to bring healing to the firefighter couples. Now, he specializes in helping couples and therapists find their way through the intense heat and confusion of reactive relationships.
The sad day is here when we say goodbye to Dr. Adam Mathews. Join Laurie and Adam as they share their fond memories of working together. Listen through to the end where are fabulous editor Joe added a compilation of outtakes and bloopers! You can even hear Madison our intern chiming in off mic.
You can still sign up to be with Laurie and Adam at Love and Sex 360 the weekend of November 15-17th.
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Money is one of the Big 3 -- along with Time and Energy. Negotiating the issues around money impacts a couple's capacity for intimacy. Join sex therapist and author Laurie Watson and couples therapist Dr. Adam Mathews as they explore the money issue.
Join us for Love and Sex 360 in beautiful Asheville, NC November 15-17.
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One weekend, three commitments, better sex. Join sex therapist and author Laurie Watson and couples therapist Dr. Adam Mathews as they discuss how in one weekend with three commitments you can have a better sexual relationship.
Also a special announcement!
Join Laurie and Adam and their colleagues Shelly and Carol for Love and Sex 360, a weekend in November in lovely Asheville NC. More details here!
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